Part Two--Things That Happen When You Finally Decide to Live Your Dreams

Following up on our previous post from a terrific article that appeared on success.com, here are some more things that begin to happen when you make the decision to live your own life and follow your own dream.

You’ll no longer fear success or wealth. The most crippling and pervasive fear is the fear of success. Many people genuinely believe success is a sin, or that it’s not intended for them. But once you have a compelling vision, you stop focusing on yourself. Money is simply a means to an end. Money is a tool. Not only is your success inevitable, but it’s also essential for accomplishing what you feel inspired to accomplish.

You’ll no longer fear “losing it all.” You are already complete. No form of success or failure will change that. Consequently, you’re no longer attached to your reputation, accomplishments or possessions. If all of it was somehow lost, you’d have complete confidence that you could continue moving forward. You’d adjust and continue to expect the universe to conspire for your good. This perspective allows you to be more authentic and free. You’re no longer trying to please everyone around you.  As Ryan Holiday wrote in The Obstacle is the Way, “There is no good or bad without us; there is only perception. There is the event itself and the story we tell ourselves about what it means.”

You’ll consistently do what’s right, even when it’s not popular. Most people can eat healthy for one day. Most people can be positive for a few minutes. But when things stop being fun, most people’s resolves crumble. Not you. Not anymore. Consistency is the evidence of belief. Harvard business professor, Clayton Christensen said, “100 percent commitment is easier than 98 percent commitment.” When you justify incongruent behaviors once, you open the door to a lifetime of justifications.

You’ll have more responsibility. Spider-Man’s Uncle Ben once told Peter Parker, “With great power comes great responsibility.” Unfortunately, he had it backward. The constraints of responsibility force you to think more creatively. Responsibility qualifies you to show up at a higher level. Hence Benjamin Franklin’s saying, “If you want something done, ask a busy person.”Most people avoid responsibility. They’d rather someone else carry the load. They’d rather not have to deal with the consequences. Fear of failure (i.e., their ego) stops them from trying in the first place. When you start taking your dreams seriously, you will not initially be qualified. But as you take on greater responsibility, you’ll become qualified to do what you need to do. You’ll grow into your responsibilities and have increased power and influence.

You’ll often be questioned and criticized for what you’re doing. When you begin living your dreams, you will often receive unsolicited critique. If something is noteworthy, there will be haters. As Robin Sharma, author of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, has said, “haters confirm greatness.” When you really start showing up, the haters will be intimidated by you. Rather than being a reflection of what they could do, you become a reflection of what they are not doing. This isn’t about you. It’s about them and their own insecurity.

You’ll often be misunderstood. By nature, having a sense of vision is weird to most people. Being real and authentic is weird. It’s unusual and it’s rare. It’s peculiar. And many people will misunderstand you. A lot of people won’t get what you’re about or why you’re doing what you’re doing. Most of them mean well. They simply don’t get it and are afraid of what they don’t understand. Others will understand you. They’ll support you and cheer you on. Don’t take these people for granted. You need them more than you know.

You’ll be completely transparent about the good, the bad and the ugly. Most people inflate their goodness and minimize their failings and shortcomings. However, beyond your point of no return, you no longer care about looking stupid. You’re more concerned with the truth. You want deep and intimate connections. Furthermore, you’re humble enough to admit when you are wrong or if you’ve changed your mind. At the same time, you’re not hiding. As Jim Carrey says, "You’re not afraid of being seen in all your glory." You’re not afraid of admitting you rock at something and that you want to use your skills to help.

You’ll make things right with people you’ve wronged. Embracing—rather than avoiding—reality requires that you carry no unnecessary baggage. You want to be completely clear so you’re able to create and flow. As a result, you openly apologize for things you’ve done wrong in the past. You seek forgiveness, which is really more about you than the person you harmed. It’s not your choice how people respond to your genuine apologies.

You’ll be more authentic in public. Who do you have to impress? Once you know what you want and you’re completely set on doing it you stop caring about ridiculous stuff, like what you’re wearing that day. This doesn’t mean you have to be a slob. But if for some reason, you have a wardrobe malfunction, you won’t let it ruin your day. Beyond clothing and appearance, you are wholly yourself rather than what society would tell you is proper.

You’ll put yourself out there more. It will initially be embarrassing to start putting yourself out there. But you’re not going to let your ego get in the way of your vision. So you’ll put yourself out there at the expense of looking foolish. You’ll put yourself out there at the expense of being wrong because fear no longer drives your behavior. Even if you are unsure of what you’re doing, you’d rather act in faith than hide in fear. You’d rather accept the consequences of trying your best than hiding your talents.

You’ll be genuinely happy for other people’s success. As an evolved person, you are happy when other people succeed and sad when other people fail. The success of others is seen as the success of the whole. You genuinely want what’s best for everyone, even those you consider your competitors. Jealousy and envy are the ego, which operates out of fear. You’ve moved beyond that.

You’ll need more alone time for the deep work. “Delegate everything except genius.” —Dan Sullivan. Once you’re serious about living your dreams, you’ll need to build a team. In the beginning, you’ll probably need to manage most of the logistics yourself. But the sooner you delegate, the more energy you can put into the work only you can do. Eventually, you’ll want to delegate everything except your superpower. You are the creator and your team makes it real. As Dan Sullivan said, “There are all kinds of great things going on in the company that I know nothing about.” Deep work is essential for creation. But it is becoming increasingly difficult to do. You will need to be vigilant against endless distractions and time-wasters.

You’ll have way more time. “You have to work less to make more money.”  —Dan Sullivan. When you commit to living intentionally:

• You will excrete the elements of your life that don’t fit.
• You will repel people who poison your spirit.
• You will attract mentors who help you progress.
• You will build a team that multiplies your work and takes care of the moving parts.

In short, you will have way more time than you’re used to having.

• Your life will be simpler.
• You will be focused exclusively on those things which matter most to you. 
• You’ll be holistically healthy: You’ll make time for fitness, learning, engaging with others, rest and recovery, and adventure.
• You will be living the abundant life. This is the most natural way to live. It’s the life of creation and power.

 

The Obstacle Is the Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph