More Acts of Body Language Leaders Should Avoid

Adding on to an earlier entry here are more body language acts leaders should avoid. 

Resting Hands Behind the Head or on the Hips – This is usually interpreted as a sign of superiority or big-headedness.  Only use these gestures when you’re in the presence of close friends.

Not Directly Facing the Person You’re Speaking To – This indicates a certain level of discomfort or a lack of interest.  When we’re happily engaged in a conversation we face the person we’re speaking to with our feet and torso facing directly forward. When we’re unsure of the other person, or not completely committed to the conversation, we tend to angle our feet and torso to the side.  Face directly forward during a conversation to give off the impression that you’re truly interested in what the other person is saying.

Crossing Your Arms – This is a sign of defensive resistance.  Some people may also interpret it as a sign of egotism.  Always try to keep your arms open and at your sides.

Displaying a Sluggish Posture – When you’re in an environment bustling with people your posture becomes an immediate telltale sign of your confidence and composure. Your stance literally makes a stand for you, delivering a clear message about how you should be treated.  It can make a huge difference in the way strangers respond to you. Place your feet a comfortable distance apart, keep your shoulders pulled back, head up and greet people with direct eye contact and a firm handshake.

Scratching at the Backside of Your Head and Neck – This a typical sign of doubt and uncertainty.  It can also be interpreted as an indication of lying. Try to keep your hands away from your head when you’re communicating with others.

Messing With the Collar of Your Shirt – This screams: “I feel horribly uncomfortable and/or nervous!”  Once again, keep track of your hands. Don’t fidget.

Increasing Your Rate of Blinking – This a clear sign of anxiety. Some people start blinking their eyes really fast (in conjunction with an increased heart rate) when they get nervous. Since most people try to make eye contact, it becomes immediately obvious to others. Be cognizant of your blinking habits when you’re nervous, especially if someone is looking at you from a close proximity.

Slouching Your Shoulders – This indicates low self-esteem. People associate perked-up shoulders with strong self-confidence.  Always pull your shoulders back.  Not only will you look more confident, you’ll feel more confident as well.

Standing with Your Hands Crossed Over Your Genitals – This casual posture almost guarantees that you’ll lose a little respect before you even have the chance to speak a single word. People feeling nervous or unsure of themselves will unconsciously take a guarded stance. Quite frequently they adopt a posture that guards one of their most vulnerable areas, their genitals. This stance pushes your shoulders forward and makes your entire body look smaller and weaker.  Again, try to keep your hands at your sides and your shoulders back.

Propping Up Your Head with Your Hands – “I’m getting bored!”  Never prop up your head with your elbows and hands during a conversation.  Place your hands on the table in front of you and keep them at rest.

Wiping Sweaty Hands onto Your Clothes – This is a sign of frantic nervousness.  If your hands are sweating, just let them sweat.  Take a few deep breaths and try to relax.

Sitting on the Edge of Your Chair – This is a clear indication of being mentally and physically uncomfortable.  It’s an apprehensive stance that will make others around you feel uncomfortable as well.  Keep your rear end firmly planted on the surface of the seat.  When you lean forward, use your back without moving your bottom.

Foot and Finger Tapping – This usually indicates stress, impatience or boredom.  Monitor your habits and practice keeping your limbs at rest.

Using Your Hands to Fidget with Small Objects: a pen, paper ball, etc. This is another sign of anxiety.  It can also be interpreted as a lack of preparedness.  It’s always best to keep your hands comfortably at rest when you’re in the presence of others.

Repeatedly Shifting Body Weight from Foot to Foot – This is another gesture that usually indicates mental and physical discomfort.  People may also see this and assume that you’re ready to abandon the conversation, especially if you’re not directly facing them.  Don’t shift your feet around more than once every 2 to 3 minutes.

--Adapted from article written by Marc Chernoff

The Definitive Book of Body Language: The Hidden Meaning Behind People's Gestures and Expressions